People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize