it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
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