Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
