Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize