It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
