worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
i dont even know how to be here
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
