i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
