people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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