Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
being pregnant is like rehab
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
