Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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