Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Let's get the cat blown out
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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