I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
