Its about making memories worth repressing
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize