oh god the rape fog is back!
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
