This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
