Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
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