We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
