Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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