I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
