so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I just gargled with NyQuil
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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