im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
