I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize