why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
