your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
