I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
