I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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