Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
