Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
