do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
