fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Randomize
