I think scott just propositioned me for sex
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
