...so i touched it.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
