In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
