Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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