so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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