dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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