So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
