doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
