In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
