I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
