Christians are straight up FREAKS
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
