You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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