Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
