he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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