I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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