You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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