This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
