so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
