Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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