I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize