i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
