well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
